Motivated (?)

I think this semester is the nightmare of my study time. A lot of things happened recently, and I almost failed in one of my subject. Well it's all my fault, I admit it. Being unmotivated and not focus. I almost waste 300 thousand for a subject, it sucks, disappointing, and embarrassing. Which was caused by my lazyness and clumsyness and unfocusness and all stupid reasons.

I could see the way my lecturers looked at me, and I know they were very disappointed. Alas, I do want to change not because of them. It's just disturbed me whenever I disappoint people, whoever they are. Well maybe I have this kind of personality which I intend to try to satisfy other people, and would feel very guilty if I disappoint them.

Whatever happened in my life, I just hope that I could change it. Change the way I see things, the way I overcome problems. Err... Maybe I just have to made up my mind, and be motivated as the first time I came to my campus.